Commissioner. Three rings. Zero appeals granted.
The Iron Fist has run this league since the two-division days and has the hardware to back up the gavel: titles in 2010, 2013 and 2021, plus sixteen straight seasons of showing up. He does not lose arguments — he simply outlasts them — and his trade offers arrive as final drafts, take it or leave it (most leave it). Fun fact he'd like you to know: the league-record 266.6 points in a single game are his. Fun fact he'd rather you didn't: 3–14 lifetime against the webmaster.
Known for
- Rulings are final; the constitution is a suggestion he wrote
- Trade proposals come pre-signed — negotiation is not on the menu
- Hosts the draft, holds the gavel, keeps the receipts
- Team is named after another owner's tears, which tells you everything
By the numbers
- FBG Champion — 2010, 2013, 2021
- Runner-up — 2018
- Regular-season points title — 2021, 2025
- Best season — 2018: 11-2, 2,088.8 pts (2nd in reg. season)
- Worst season — 2010: 0-0, 0.0 pts (1st)
- Career high — 266.6 pts, 2020 wk 12 vs Brady Cakes (94.0)
- Career low — 80.8 pts, 2023 wk 4 vs 14-$0 (197.1)
Head-to-head
All meetings vs. current owners (both managing their current franchise).
| Opponent | Record | Pct | Postseason | PF | PA | Avg margin | Streak | Best win | Worst loss |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Shawn Bosler | 2-0 | 1.000 | 1-0 | 345.2 | 192.1 | +76.5 | W2 | +118.3 (2025) | — |
| Todd Bailey | 6-2 | 0.750 | 0-0 | 1,170.8 | 961.9 | +26.1 | W3 | +78.1 (2022) | -31.5 (2023) |
| Jared Smith | 8-3 | 0.727 | 1-0 | 1,649.1 | 1,512.9 | +12.4 | W1 | +79.4 (2021) | -53.4 (2019) |
| Nick Oberhaus | 2-1 | 0.667 | 0-0 | 398.9 | 414.1 | -5.1 | L1 | +13.5 (2024) | -37.8 (2025) |
| Christopher Palmer | 11-8 | 0.579 | 1-4 | 2,827.2 | 2,684.0 | +7.5 | W1 | +106.4 (2021) | -64.5 (2024) |
| Greg Bearden | 10-8 | 0.556 | 1-1 | 2,647.8 | 2,421.5 | +12.6 | L4 | +86.8 (2015) | -52.9 (2014) |
| Seth Pepkin | 12-11 | 0.522 | 2-1 | 3,404.0 | 3,401.1 | +0.1 | W1 | +86.2 (2021) | -67.3 (2023) |
| Matt Roemer | 5-6 | 0.455 | 1-1 | 1,697.1 | 1,725.7 | -2.6 | W2 | +121.1 (2025) | -116.3 (2023) |
| Bryan McClellan | 7-10 | 0.412 | 0-3 | 2,632.0 | 2,677.4 | -2.7 | W1 | +81.4 (2021) | -82.2 (2022) |
| Brett Walker | 1-2 | 0.333 | 0-0 | 470.7 | 422.2 | +16.2 | L2 | +60.6 (2023) | -9.7 (2025) |
| Scott Smith | 3-14 | 0.176 | 1-1 | 2,252.1 | 2,579.2 | -19.2 | L4 | +26.1 (2013) | -77.1 (2016) |
Season by season
Record book appearances
- #1 Highest single-game score: 266.6 pts (2020 wk 12 vs Brady Cakes)
- #1 Biggest blowout: 172.6-pt win (2020 wk 12 vs Brady Cakes)
- #3 Lowest winning score: 93.8 pts (2012 wk 15 vs Hollyweird)
- #1 Most points in a season: 11-3, 2,425.2 pts (2021)
- #3 Most points in a season: 9-4, 2,334.4 pts (2020)
Team names through the years
Palmer’s Tears (2025), Nothin but LOVE for CHUBB (2024), LOVE to LOVE (2023), Injured Reserve (2022), Injured Reserve (2021), THE BEAR JEW (2020), THE BEAR JEW (2019), Im Thielen my Green team is Gano Lynch your Gronk (2018), My small wood is bigger than yours! (2017), I'm here so I won't get fined 2.0 (2016), Seth's pepkin (2015), Iron Fist (2014), Iron Fist (2013), Iron Fist (2012), Iron Fist (2011), Iron Fist (2010)